Gifts of the Spirit

Today, I am writing something that has held me accountable for many years to my beliefs. I need people and seek them out in many ways. You may be one of the people that have embraced me and have encouraged me by you being you. 

I believe that the Spirit brings people together so that we might hold them tight. So that we may share their gifts. 

Over so many months, I have come to know one such person that has a wonderful bright future though circumstances seem dire and not bright. I pray for this person daily. Another person, has a greater outlook on life now after weight loss surgery has lifted her. To learn that suicide was part of their intent brings me to the body of this message.

God wants us to hold people tight and let them know of their worth to us. The Spirit moves us to do and say what needs to be done. Do not hold back. Do not feel that you are not making an impact. Move, write, call, text, whatever you need to do now! 

I love that the bus driver wanted to share his island with the teens and adults who were helping build the community building for his church in Wesley Dominica.  What did we want to see? Where could he bring us? We went to Freshwater Lake, a cloud forest for lunch, natural disaster site, sulphur springs, sunset and a black sand beach with fresh land crabs stalked and caught on the drive back to be eaten by some for breakfast. The Spirit was so alive in this man!

How do you feel the moving of the Spirit in your life? Who do you have uplifting you? Are you in despair? Seek help, you are worth it.

#Dominica #travel #Spirit #weight #RNY #gastric #bypass #culture #encourage #inspiration

Supportive Community

I am encouraged by many in this life. When I was raising my children into their teen years, I had support through my church with a monthly group that was called Mutual Ministries. It was often that we shared during or after having talked about the current book that we were studying our concerns, joys and prayer requests. 

I had longed for that group after many who were in it had moved away. I had sought other resources and even began a prayer time before church years ago. It worked for the time needed.

Today is the birthday of a friend who needed help controlling his addiction to alcohol. I spent nine months driving him around as he was without his license. We had a good time because we connected on many levels and had a fun relationship because of our strong belief in the power of redemption. I had started losing weight before he and I became working companions. If you haven't read my earlier posts, I was a Letter Carrier who was injured on the job. Since I could not perform fully, often I was found work like driving this fellow carrier. I had driven others in the past as some of the young men partied too hearty. 

So, in driving this particular person and giving him half my meals (lol) I became a much smaller person and a much more complete person in other ways. I learned how my food addiction and his alcohol addiction needed to be assuaged by emotional support of others. His AA buddies would call him and he was ever ready to give them time. 

I didn't say to him you are an alcoholic and I am a food-aholic but our day to day talk lead us to discover the real us. The person who needed care. Granted sometimes it was just me insisting on helping him in a way he thought he should control. Or telling him it was time to take a break or that we should go to lunch now. He was almost punishing himself for being in that situation by working continually. The situation was that he needed not only rides around the routes that he did but too and from work. He could not drive his children and had to let people know his vulnerabilities. He was a good listener as I had struggles with attitudes of others because of my limited duty at work. 

We both lost weight that year. I lost most of the eighty pounds and he lost his beer belly. We gained a friendship that has stood the test of time. We have a running joke because fear of not having the money that his family needed for running the household because he wasn't able to work overtime and his lawyer fees were taking it's toll he was going to go without lunch one day. I bought him lunch. Our joke is that I am in need of lunch and it is his turn to pay. Silly, isn't it. But a text to him on occasion means that I connect to one more of my supportive community. 

In making videos on YouTube many are drawn into the supportive community there. Now, our support can come from Facebook friends. Some of us have met in large Meet & Greets or other conferences. We can talk in personal messaging on these sites or spend a weekend hanging at the conferences. I have a conference to go to next month in Phoenix and look forward to rooming with a new friend in the weight loss community.

 We can share experiences and build each other up in our communities. We can get the help we need when we feel like there is no hope. Remember that we are here for a higher purpose that is to befriend be friends. 

How do you find support? Have you had weight loss surgery? Are you going through the process and hope to have surgery this year? May you find a connection that works for you. 

#RNY #gastric #bypass #transfer #addictions #supportive #community #Facebook #alcohol #surgery

Semper Fi

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My eldest grandson is a Marine. He has begun his second year this July.

All day, I think of him. I wish he was close so I can hug him. I know he needed to grow up. I could not do what he did. I could not go through basic training.

Today is a year after my brother Gary succumbed to cancer at 3:18 in the morning. I have thought of him all day. I think oh yeah, almost home, going past where he learned to drive and was tested for his driver's license with me as his sponsor. I was five years older than Gary. His wife lived a good life with their three children and my brother and two jobs before he learned that he had cancer. Gary's cancer was in him so long and so deeply in his tissues and systems that there was no marker where it started. God was faithful to Gary and kept him going five years beyond when the cancer must have begun.

What a day. To be every faithful to those we love. A day of rain, a day of discussion with my youngest grandson about his week.

I picked up my youngest grandson from the Christian Camp Aldersgate in N Scituate RI. It is a great camp where children and teens learn what it means to be ever faithful to God. How Jesus Christ came for them. How the Holy Spirit works in them to show others their faith.

A day of talking and having fun at a steak restaurant where we shared a meal. He ate the majority of it. He and I were posting things on Instagram and Facebook before the meal came. It was a beautiful filet mignon cooked just right to melt in our mouth.

I looked at the salads and reminded myself that there was plenty of salad ingredients at my home. I needed to get my protein in and a filet is the best for me.

As I think of the journey that I am traveling since having weight loss surgery, I wonder can I be ever faithful? Or do I stray? How do I make sure I am following the path that I need to follow? I make sure that I take my vitamins and supplements. I make sure that I get my protein and water in. I do what I can by walking.

How do you solve the issue of your faith in yourself? Do you let your food addiction control you? Do you believe in yourself enough to be ever faithful? How have you changed? Are you pre-surgery or post surgery? What do you believe to be the one thing that you need to overcome to be faithful?

Please say what you want to say in the comments below. Thanks for your attention.

#Marine #grandson #proud #faith #growth #cancer #sibling #brother #friend #RNY #surgery #gastric #bypass

Just a Little Pitch for My Surgical Team & Hospital

 had my RNY gastric bypass surgery with Dr Pablo Gazmuri who has retired in May '12. My surgery was January 3 2008. Prior to surgery, I lost 81 pounds and met my surgical team in August '07 50 pounds lighter that I started in February.
I was so sad to see him leave. He was 65, so possibly it was a great move for him. I now have Dr Sheila Partridge a top notch surgeon in the field of bariatrics.
The hospital that I went to is Newton Wellesley Hospital Massachusetts. It is a great place with beds, chairs and gurneys the right size for the obese patient. The nursing staff was spectacular.
I am so pleased to have the ongoing care where I meet with a dietitian, nurse and the bariatric surgeon once a year now for life.
There are many opportunities to continue with the after care program in seminar format rather than small groups. It was something that I really liked when I was more able to make the meeting times. I think anyone would like this Center of Excellence pratice.

Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep

Here is a poem that I have to think of when I am thinking of my family who have passed on. I miss them dearly.

Do not stand
at my grave and weep.
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds
that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight
on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awake in the
morning's hush
I am the soft uplifting rush
of quiet birds in circling flight.
I am the soft star that
shines at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there.
I did not die.

--- Anonymous

 

This is the week that my brother died. I will not weep for him on Friday. I will think of his lovely family and pray that they can get through the day. Last week, on July 17th, it would have been his 61st birthday. He died of cancer. I learned of this cancer and was able to go visit him last year in March. It was a good week. We shared our stories and got to meet his dear wife and connect with her on a far deeper level. In August, last year, I spent another week with her during the week that she had a memorial service for Gary.

 

How do you deal with the loss of love ones? Is it a time to share with family? Is it a time to emotionally eat? I am saddened this week and trying to keep my eating in check. I do not feel that I am an emotional eater.

 

Yet, when I look back to different experiences, we celebrated with food. Bought a new car when money was tight, celebrated by going out to eat. Had to move from a large home into a small apartment without my daughter's family who were sharing the home and the new grandson, go out to eat.

 

Okay, it may be that I eat emotionally but now that I have the tool of RNY gastric bypass, I cannot eat much. That large steak that I order either gets eaten over four days or shared with others. The next time you feel that you are going to eat something because your emotions are out of control, take a step back. Are you really hungry? What will give you the best nutrients and will satisfy your needs for food? If it is "bad" for you, can you limit the amount?

 

 

Weekend Ahead

How do you spend your time during the weekend? Do you have extra chores to do? Is it a fun weekend or a busy work around the house weekend for you?

This weekend, I have two parties to go to. It will be busy because I also need to get my grandson to camp in RI. I am thinking that it might be an opportunity to see my foster daughter as well. She works every other weekend.

Tonight, I hope to visit my friend who had total knee replacement done on Monday. She is at a rehab center where she will get all the OT and PT that she needs. Let's hope she wants company. I sent an email just before 5 pm.

I knew this would be a short entry but I want to keep up with the promise to myself to make a blog post more frequently.

I expect my husband home soon. His meatloaf is now done. I must go out and prepare the rest of the meal. Do I give him another salad? He has had four salads this week.

He has been preparing his own lunches these past two weeks. It is eerie that he does this because he did not take lunches up until about four years ago steady. I think about his fall and his knee surgery constantly this month. He was so incapacitated for most of the 12 weeks that he was home. I returned to work in September not being fully sure that he would do well with me away from him 9 hours a day. I had his meals already made and at the front of the fridge so he could get them without doing much bending or searching.

His fall came June 29 2009 at the theater where we saw a chick flick. It is crazy that this made him known on the floor that he went to a chick flick and was hurt. He is great laughing at that and did repeat it to the two women who came in for his OT and PT.

I just want to say that his control over his diabetes is so well done.

Can you wonder why I love this man?

I remember responding to a woman on fb who just had an accident. In the accident, she was not hurt very much just aches but her car was severely damaged. It reminded me of the accident that I called to speak to Bobby in the 70s when I was single. He came over and was very attentive. I was emotionally distraught then and for a long time following this accident because the person did not have to run into me. He was stopped at a stop sign. I was taking a left turn. I know now that I could not have been killed but I felt in my heart that it was a near miss with death back then. My car door was smashed in and I could not use it. Strange how I was able to exit the car on the right side over the console.

Oh yes, there have been other near misses. I took my husband's fall as a near miss. I did not know what caused him to fall. I saw him writhing in pain. Did he have a heart attack? What was going on? I just did not know. He was in so much pain that he was unable to speak at first.

So, I find myself starting this blog post as a joyful rendition of my weekend. I go on to get all sappy remembering two accidents and now I am thinking about L. and possibly seeing her again. She was two when I first met her. She is 29 now. I hope I can get to see her this weekend if not in two weeks.

Let us hope it is not a near miss.

Social Justice is My Passion

I thought that I should let you know more about me beyond weight loss. I have done many things in my life that I am very proud about. My job as a Letter Carrier helped me to see that there is poverty close to where I live. I help in ways to alleviate this by bringing produce to a family shelter in Framingham that my church collects on Sunday along with other members of our commission. I brought food and clothing over to a food pantry in Natick for many years from our church. We have collected for Thanksgiving baskets through an inner city church and bring food for food pantries around our area. Yes, food poverty is one thing that I can help alleviate.

But there are more to my passions than food. I care for other people. I care for people of color, of different sexual persuasions and for the downtrodden that are hurt by the loss due to homelessness, mental issues and teenage angst. Yes, we have people here in this country who are losing out on their best life because they are not getting sufficient nutrients, medical care and education.

Violence seems to be a way that some communicate their hurt and fear. I hope we have a significant curb to the gun violence in our country where young people have access to weapons to express their hurt and pain. Please take the time to read these two passages that I found on Facebook today. It lead me to want to blog about my passions today.



Alex Fraser wrote this and I found it on Facebook.


Dear George Zimmerman,

For the rest of your life you are now going to feel what its like to be a black man in America.

You will feel people stare at you. Judging you for what you think are unfair reasons. You will lose out on getting jobs for something you feel is outside of your control. You will believe yourself to be an upstanding citizen and wonder why people choose to not see that.

People will cross the street when they see you coming. They will call you hurtful names. It will drive you so insane some days that you'll want to scream at the top of your lungs. But you will have to wake up the next day, put on firm look and push through life.

I bet you never thought that by shooting a black male you'd end up inheriting all of his struggles.

Enjoy your "freedom."

Sincerely,

A black male who could've been Trayvon Martin




Here is another's thoughts help move me to strive for justice

Conflict transformation sometimes means starting the conversation about a conflict that is simmering in the darkness, out of view of many. So we are called to shine a light on hidden or tolerated injustice. As Jesus says in John 3:20, "Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed." And Matthew 5:14: "You are the Light of the world." So faithful discipleship means we raise awareness about issues that are hard to hear, especially because they are hard to hear- and always in a spirit of Love.





The passions that I have for social justice causes makes me a better person. I work for social justice in my church. I have been on many work teams to build strong community with people of other cultures, as well as doing all that is possible to keep up an inner city church through attending their services and homecoming events, and building a home for someone who lost their home to Hurricane Hugo years ago. Now, I hope that I encourage those who are in the weight loss community by my actions, my words and my support on the many social media from Youtube, Facebook, ObesityHelp and Sparkpeople.

I took courses to learn how I could learn where I did not know how to show tolerance for other people. I did not realize some of the privileges that I expect and therefore the prejudices that I had. I expect to go into a store and not be followed. I do not expect others to judge me by my color. When I was obese, I experienced being ignored by sales people. I lost about 100 pounds when I went to look for a tv stand that would hold new tv. A woman came right over to me when I entered the store. It was an eyeopening moment for me. Was that the store policy or just my perception of how I was treated more often than not?

What are your passions? What makes you go the extra mile? Where do you go that shows you want to expand community with others? Is your community small or growing?


#social #justice #passion #faith #church #tolerance #teach #judge #RNY #obesity #gastric #bypass #weightloss #surgery #freedom #unfair